Instacart Sucks

A Gonzo Descent into the Overpriced, Overmarketed Hell of Grocery Delivery

Let me tell you a little story about modern capitalism — a tale soaked in spilled almond milk and corporate Kool-Aid. Once upon a time, Instacart was your digital grocery sherpa. A hero. A last-minute savior when you were three edibles deep and couldn’t face Trader Joe’s. But now? Now it’s a rotting, money-gorged ghoul, staggering around on the zombifie…